My meal and the winters...

It's been very very diffcult and agonisiing to search for food in the last two months. I have solely been dependent on a cup of tea, bread butter, maggie and lately on a nearby Tandoor for last two months following my mother's ailment.

Tea was the ulitmate source to keep my body warm after returning from office at 11.00 p.m or a little late at times during to 'important visits of dignitaries in foreign'. Driving in dense fog, the chill of the open route, and the sight of the Tandoor being closed at times was quite agonising. But I had no choice except to just rush up to have anything I found or could manage to access to at home and just retire into bed.

In the morning, I would again prepare tea but didn't get enough time to go and get breakfast. As, at the best I could get Chole Bhature or Kachori which I already have to take in lunch. And, it's double consumption could affect my stomach very badly. So I preffered remaining busy and forgetting I have to have something. Sometimes my busy ness helped, but most of the times it just reflected in my irritating mood. I would just rush to canteen everday for lunch time , the minute I reached office at 1.3o or 2.00, if work permitted.

Two or three friends were very very kind enough to understand my agony and limitations, as I don't know how to cook beyond maggie or tea. They brought sumptous food on days from home for me. I had tears in my eyes to see their sense of care and affection for me. I am indebted to their gesture.

At night I used to get late from office and whenver it was over 11.00 p.m. the Dhaba was closed. My meals have largely been Maggie or a cup of tea or at times bread and butter.

The neighbourhood Tandoor been a bliessing though as it prepares homely food which doesn't affect stomach.

I even arranged for my dinner from some local Dhaba for some days. But after seven days I stomach and through were badly affected due to it being a spicy food. I preferred cancelling it and restarted wtih teh Tandoor.

I used to rush to home to reach the Tandoor before 11.00. but at times it was closed by 10.30. As the other customers would visit it earlier dur to dense fog. It was actually very emotional feeling for me at times, whenver i slept with a cup of tea, which was at time not drinkable at times ...Kachi Pakki chai.

In the morning, I would again prepaer tea for myself but won't hve enough time most of the days to bring breakfast.

Chole kulche have been a blessing though. I had it like five days a week. On the other two days I would try to skip it for stomach's sake.
Canteen food was of immense help too. As it was the only source, which gave me actual complete food in entire day. Evenings have been for Chai.

Contd.....

It's true this had been a very scaring time for me becasue of my mother's health. Everyday passed in the fear that she should not get paralysed. Her brain stroke and occasion tilting of lips kept giving me goosebums. I always prayed insided my heart. Bhagwan bus ye sardiyan tapa de..... But it was also very difficult remaining occupied to justfiy salary, as it is the only source of earning, attending to phone calls with their own demands to talk, reading newspapers and surviving in the challenging phase of jobs despite always remembering my mother. The evening shifts were a blessing, as in morning I could spend time with her and fog and chill in air was nothing for that convenience. It simply felt convenience of different sort to me. But it was particularly in morning she always had difficulty, as it's been chilling all these days. My compulsion and biggest regret was I didn't know how to cook. And, she could not cook for her only Roti which she required for breakfast before having her first dose of medicine. Whenver there was trouble of lips, me or my elder brother would take her to our family physician, as she would generally have high BP in morning or develop sweating at 5 a.m.. I would come to learn of it only at 9.00 when i used to enter her room at first floor. I found it very very distressing and embarrassing to notice her in such a condition.

She would just say: Mainu zara doctor kol le javein ga? Maine paseena bada aanada hai sawere. Or..she would say at times...mainu doctor kol lai chal..blood pressure mahsoos ho raya hai. It pained me a lot for not being a Doctor or a proper cook to make anything available to her in that time also. I was solely dependent on Bhabhi's help, the indivudal i have never felt taking obligation from.

I know her moody temperament which could tranlate into obligation at any day of life. But as I was incapable in such a condition I allowed and didn't object she preparing Phulka for her in morning. I felt very nice that at least she is getting some help at home. In such a condition I was naturally oblivious to what was happening to me, as it never felt even a bit after watching her in such a condition. Mumma would never demand anything from me, as she was feeling guilty of not being able to cook for me.

Despite her suffering, which aggravated in morning, but reamined ok in day time during sunny days, she would enquire from my Thali at night what i had the previous night. It was actually very touching to see her love for me even in such a condition.

But I decided I would always have sth. to eat and sound as much as i can that I am completely happy with my night food even if it included Maggie or bread butter. But on days when I had just tea at night, I would pretend Office which kha ke aaya si....tumhe kuch nahin pata...ai te samjdhar hon di training ho gayi hai...hun main samajh raya han kivein Mere toon hostel wale mundey Khan-Khoon da arrangement kar lende ne. I tried my best to make her believe me that I was speaking truth and nothing but truth....but....I know she is afterall my mother.

Only once she uttered her pain saying: Tainu ki pata ...Mainu kivein lagda....jad main roti ne de sakdi tere layi....aur tu khali cup cha da pi ke Guzara chala lena hain....tu ki samajh na hain....mainu samajh nai aandi......bhudape which aa ke ....aini mushkil ho gayi hai....main badi sharminda haan. It shocked me. I was in tears in my bedroom.

Those words were an actual revealation of a mother's heart and belongingness with her child. I always thought I could befool her with my tactics. I forgot she was afterall my Maan.

By the way, she is improving a bit I believe. We still have to see a cardiologitst. But she can eat one chapati on some days, otherwise it doesn't go inside. milk, tea and don't know other, if any, liquid stuff is digestable for her in small quantities.

"The Mission Accomplished"

Today, Jan.29, 2010, is one of the most delightful days for me. For others, it may have been just another day of daily life. But for me, it turned extra special when I managed to click the pics of an illuminated Rashtrapati Bhavan finally.

As two years ago I started clicking that by mobile camera, then again on next year I clicked some but always wished to have a camera.

But Ajita, a journalist friend, now in Australia said....Sir you should take camera at least.It just made me realised that I actually needed it and after a long research and enquiries bought this Nikon S 700.

But I kept waiting for this day, Jan.26, when the Rashtrapati Bhavan is illuminated and thousands of people converge to watch it. I waited very excitedly the whole year.

And after so many clicks throughout the year of trees, clouds and many other things I finally managed it today. I had also clicked a lot of them on Jan.26 twoo but due to night time clicks being first occasion for me, they didn't come well. All got blurred or lens had problem of dots. I was utterly disappointed from my camera's limitation to capture this one time illumination of the magnficent Rashtrapati Bhavan.

But today, on Jan.29, (the last day of illumination) once again I happened to cross this place.

Despite it being my weekly off day, I just went and clicked them again. Though the results could be better, but I am thoroughly delighted.

Not many may know this majestic builiding is the most fascinating place for me whole year, as I have tried to capture it many a times in day time. But this special day, was the most awaited. Thank you God....u inspired me to take photography as a hobby and now making it my most absorbing passion after writing to have happened in my life in last 10 years!

Hence, it wasn't just another set of pics by me. It's actually "The Mission Achieved".

I am speechless......

My remorse cannot be explained through mere words. As words are afterall just words, one can play with them or hide behind them to pretend and remain a rogue in the disguise of an honest man. Still, I value the sanctity of words and choose to speak up from my heart. I have just words and that's how I can reveal my mind and soul.

I have felt guilty for not being available when it mattered the most on three occasion in last two months. Two of the occasions were the most regretful incidents of my life, as they belonged to two closest friends. One of them lost her father and the other, her mother. I express my condolences from the depth of my heart. I felt ashamed of not being of any worth or use for them when they should have someone trustable with them. I just could not be there with them due to responsibiilites at the workplace.

But it is also true that I genuinely wanted to be with them at any cost. But I couldn’t. The sorry is too little word to say anything about my guilty and moral and social crime.

One of them being Lakshmi, my closest friend and a supporter of the most difficult phase of life when I was in search of first job at any cost. She is my classmate and still a big mental support which helps me carry on in professional life with solace. Her beloved father had been suffering from cancer for a few months. She would tell me almost on routine basis how she was undergoing mental agony but could not share with mother. She wanted to avoid giving shock to her sensitive mother. The father and Lakshmi had promised each other not to let the mother learn of this disease. Both would keep mum and put up a smiling face till the last few weeks were left and doctors informed the days were numbered.

I admire the control of Lakshi and express utter sorrow that despite entire family’s best efforts, her beloved Daddy left for heavenly abode.

She wanted to handover ‘green grass’, as the father wanted to drink its juice. He was told by someone it helps dramatically in cancer. But the problem was that the special grass was available in Delhi only and father was hospitalized in Chennai. Despite best efforts to coordinate with each other , Lakshmi and me could not meet each other despite living in the same city. Whenever I would have time to meet her, she couldn’t and vice-versa.

Finally, she left for Chennai at the desperate call from her sister to be with her father for the last time.

For not being able to be of any use to her will remain lifetime guilt in my conscience.

The other girl is Gayatri, a former colleague at ANI. Though we never worked in one section, as she belonged to electronic media and me, print media, but our vibes made it sure that we were like-minded. I remember she even left her job at ANI for her mother’s health four years ago. She had tears in eyes and couldn’t control them on her last day at ANI, as she left for Kolkata to be with her ailing mother.

We met after four years on roadside. She had joined Live India channel. Both of us were thrilled to meet once again. We shared a good time talking like school kids reuniting after a long phase of life. But then we would talk over phone and share laughter. He mother had carried on with the disease all this years somehow. So I never doubted she would be visiting the hospital for the last time. Last October (2009), Gayatri told me he mother was again hospitalized. I thought it was routine.

Later she informed she was in ICCU. I felt worried for Aunty but avoided visiting her in hospital. She said the mother was recuperating gradually and been shifted to the ward. But she added that the mother was not keeping on well still. I didn’t feel the seriousness of the statement. I hoped she would be alright again and prayed in my heart for her earliest recovery. The office routine kept me heavily occupied in the meantime and I just couldn’t call Gayatri for a long time.

Once I called her up and she said she remains on night or day duty at hospital for her mother, as she required somebody to be with her. It worried me and I avoided calling her up lest I should disturb her at an odd hour of the day. She could be relaxing at home after the night duty or just been attending her darling mother by her bed side. I avoided calling, hence.

But one day, when I did to ask about aunty…I was shocked. Gayatri said: “Mummy to Guzar gayi”.

The answer left me inexplicable to utter any more word. I felt as if her whole world had come to an end. It was because I knew she valued her mother the most and had literally devoted her entire young life for her well-being. The grief overwhelmed me. I just put down the phone and left the room in silence. I narrated that to my mother. She also felt pained to hear that news.


But, inside my heart, the guilt of not been able to be with Lakshmi and Gayatri, the two loving friends of lifetime, hurt me the most. Till date, I am ashamed of my ‘busy’ routine.

It's Sunday!!

Meaning of celebrating a day in our daily life can take a completely different meaning some times by mistake. I learnt this new fact of life today.

I felt how at times it could be disastrous but funny anecdote of life as well.

So many surprises occurring in just an hour’s time on January16 (2010) left me in peels of laughter, as I realized it all happened due to a silly mistake about the exact day, after I mistook Saturday for a Sunday.

As a routine, bosses take their weekly off on Sunday and the workload is relatively less. Hence, I had reason to be cheerful about the day.

Even in the morning by 9 o’clock, my senior colleague Pankaj Chaudhary’s call regarding some problem in a blog, felt a bit surprising. As I was astonished to think after all what made him turn up on this day, as he is also off on Sundays. It must be for increment, I felt, as he woke me up early in the morning (9’o clock)!

Feeling it was Sunday, I left early for office thinking it would allow me to leave for home on time or earlier, if nobody pointed out.

On my way to office, the sight of everything and everyone I usually come across on working days looked a bit like a ‘Surprise of the Day’.

I was perturbed to see so much traffic on roads despite it being a Sunday. I said: “Oh, this traffic has swelled actually beyond limit.” Usually, most of the office-goers’ vehicles are off roads. “So much cars, so many scooters and even Rikshaw-pullers are adding to the traffic snarls on a day like Sunday,” I said it myself.

Well, I arrived in office at 12.30, half-an-hour earlier, thinking the bosses will not be there. And, this was good enough reason to be happy. I was content that in any case I would not have to see the terrifying faces. I looked so cheerful, thinking it was Sunday and not much work would be there.

I climbed up the stairs to the third floor of the office building in a lesuirely mood. I felt so relaxed.

I was surprised to smell the aroma of food coming from canteen into stairs. “The canteen guy must be overworking or been forced to come for half day,” I thought and smiled.

But little did I have any idea that the friends I often find absent on Sundays would be greeting me today. Their full presence in office surprised me, as I kept walking towards my seat while responding with my smile and surprise to the “Hello” or “Good Morning Sandeep Sir”.

But the very first sight of my News Editor, Dixit assigning some task to a colleague in office near my seat, surprised me. How come he is there in office today? , I asked myself. Well, it could be some important work, which must have brought him to office today, I replied to myself.

I was surprised to see so many people being present on this 'Sunday'. I even asked one of my friends on Chatting box how come she was in office today...she didn't realise it .nor did it doubt my absent mindedness.

But I was woken up from my day-dreaming, only after a loving friend emailed for not greeting her as I do everyday, to say Hellooooo it's Saturday Kaurange ...

:)
I was speechless.

Indian Media's expose` or political party's sting on media moghuls ?

A recently circulated email stated how most of the news organisation are being by some particular business group or 'supported' or unoffically controlled by individuals.

Though it could be quite interesting for anyone seeking material to substantiate criticism of media in daily life, I would view it as how much constrained journalists are to bring out shades of truth as long as they serve in any organisation.

Once out of the organisation, even the readers who expect so much from them may not find even a little worth in reading such journalists' write up.

And, on practical side, one can never deny the fact that every organisation needs finance to run its show and for that it has to bear the influence of outside forces just like any other business organisation.

Even if such a 'revealation' or information is publicised by private platforms like blogs or emails, the general public should appreciate that at least something is coming out for the betterment of society off an on!

Otherwise, everyone is entitled to have its own view. I cannot obstruct someone's freedom to speech and expression as is available to the media persons as a fundamental right under Indian constituion.

Who owns the media in india ?
The Email stated advising --A VERY INTERESTING ARTICLE...ONE MUST READ--headlined "Who owns the media in India ?" stated:

Recent Gujarat election have witnessed unaccountable money
paid to media persons of both, print and electronic by Saudi
Arabia to discredit Modi and the Hindutva forces, which
Media did very faithfully without success.

There are several major publishing groups in India , the
most prominent among them being the Times of India Group,
the Indian Express Group, the Hindustan Times Group, The
Hindu group, the Anandabazar Patrika Group, the Eenadu
Group, the Malayalam Manorama Group, the Mathrubhumi group,
the Sahara group, the Bhaskar group, and the Dainik Jagran
group.

Let us see the ownership of different media agencies.


NDTV: A very popular TV news media is funded by Gospels of
Charity in Spain Supports Communism. Recently it has
developed a soft corner towards Pakistan because Pakistan
President has allowed only this channel to be aired in
Pakistan .

Indian CEO Prannoy Roy is co-brother of Prakash
Karat, General Secretary of the Communist party of India. His wife and Brinda Karat are sisters.

India Today which used to be the only national weekly which supported BJP is now bought by NDTV!! Since then the tone has changed drastically and turned into Hindu bashing.

CNN-IBN: This is 100 percent funded by Southern Baptist
Church with its branches in all over the world with HQ in
US.. The Church annually allocates $800 million for
promotion of its channel. Its Indian head is Rajdeep
Sardesai and his wife Sagarika Ghosh.


Times group list:
Times Of India, Mid-Day, Nav-Bharth Times, Stardust,
Femina, Vijay Times, Vijaya Karnataka, Times now (24- hour news channel) and many more...

Times Group is owned by Bennet & Coleman. 'World
Christian Council¢ does 80 percent of the Funding, and an
Englishman and an Italian equally share balance 20 percent. The Italian Robertio Mindo is a close relative of Sonia Gandhi.


Star TV: It is run by an Australian, who is supported by
St. Peters Pontifical Church Melbourne.


Hindustan Times: Owned by Birla Group, but hands have
changed since Shobana Bhartiya took over. Presently it is
working in Collaboration with Times Group.

The Hindu: English daily, started over 125 years has been
recently taken over by Joshua Society, Berne , Switzerland .. N. Ram's wife is a Swiss national.

Indian Express: Divided into two groups. The Indian Express and new Indian Express (southern edition) ACTS Christian Ministries have major stake in the Indian Express and latter is still with the Indian counterpart.

Eeenadu: Still to date controlled by an Indian named Ramoji Rao.

Ramoji Rao is connected with film industry and owns a huge studio in Andhra Pradesh.

Andhra Jyothi: The Muslim party of Hyderabad known as MIM along with a Congress Minister has purchased this Telugu daily very recently.


The Statesman: It is controlled by Communist Party of
India.

Kairali TV: It is controlled by Communist party of India
(Marxist)

Mathrubhoomi: Leaders of Muslim League and Communist leaders have major investment.

Asian Age and Deccan Chronicle: Is owned by a Saudi Arabian Company with its chief Editor M.J. Akbar.

Gujarat riots that took place in 2002 where
Hindus were also burnt alive, Rajdeep Sardesai and Bharkha Dutt working for NDTV at that time got around 5 Million Dollars from Saudi Arabia to cover only Muslim victims, which they did very faithfully. Not a single Hindu family was interviewed or shown on TV whose near and dear ones had been burnt alive, it is reported.


Tarun Tejpal of tehelka.com: Tehelkacom regularly gets blank cheques from Arab countries to target BJP and Hindus only, it is said.

The ownership explains the control of media in India by
foreigners. The result is obvious.

PONDER OVER THIS. NOW YOU KNOW WHY EVERY ONE IS AGAINST TRUTH, HOW VERY SAD.

Please pass this on to as many as possible. Let them know
who feeds them with biased news and information- yet call
themselves secular," the email concluded.

Surely, it would interest a lot of media critics take cudgles against their favourite punching bag. But still one tends to put a question to them: "What if tomorrow there is NO MEDIA?"
-- RegardsChaudhary Sandeep Datta

My eight-day holiday

Getting a holiday has been as difficult for me as it could be for an increment in the news organisation I work for. But that's part and parcel of a journalistic life, I believe.

It is quite difficult to explain what actually I did during all these holidays. Still, I wish to so that at least I could understand much before I could explain.

First day, Dec.28, 2009
As I had spent the previous day in much excitement, I wanted to perform or rather live every moment of my each day as per my solid plan. I wanted to make most of it.

I am not a nice man for all.

For a long time I haven't written for this personal platform. The office stress or personal life prevented it. But two topics have been pushing me from inside to enunciated what's coming in my mind and rather remains there. I want the world to know it.

Main hi Hindu, Main hi Musalmaan...Main hi Sikh, Isai

Role of household women in brinng up children by sacrificing their professional careers

Aug.9,2002

Why Do I want to Pursue Journalism?

Dreams do get realized sometime in life. Perhaps, this is what happened in my case too. To name any single reason ,as “main”,would be lessening others importance.But this dilemma ,in no way, affect the shape of my real objective for joining journalism.

The psyche, instead of mere reason, is the deep urge;to know and to understand things, happening everywhere.To witness them for expressing ,later on, with the intensity of hard core truth. Yes,this is the briefest possible answer to state my real purpose of pursuing journalism.
Personally,it would be an answer those questioning eyes that underestimate the potential of a middle class lad who wants to learn. I want to give a befitting reply to those who laugh it aside whenever the eagerness of a government school kid is “argued/discussed”.

But, professionally want to utilize my talent by becoming a voice of those who generally stay unheard by anyone. My wish is to raise the suppressed and sidelined issues that affect the common men.

Innumerable complaining voices turn mute but the people in “authority”, take a sound sleep.Why ? Isn’t it something absurd. May be these intentionally ignored voices inspire me to work for them. The forgetful “minds” need to be convincingly remembered that they are always accountable to the common man, not to forget them.

To me, Journalism is the appropriate platform to awake “our”Politicians to take notice of what pains the distressed souls.It is a medium to speak about, how it feels when the powerless is overpowered/crushed by the powerful? And, for me, similar things like these, remain unexpressed ,adequately, till date.So, I want to touch them,realistically.

I believe, only a journalist can deliver the real message of sufferers. For,if a journalist didn’t , then who would?

Innocent people can not be let betrayed by a few rogue minds. There has to be a check. Let there be no puppet show allowed to continue uninterrupted? If a journalist didn’t help, then perhaps,no one in this world would.

If the “official liberty” to buzz the danger alarm is not utilized even by a journalist ,then, whom to look forward to? Let there be a feel of being protected among the feeble souls, this is what I what I want to give.

I feel, it’s a responsibility of the “educated ones” to point out the social concerns. If it ‘s not their task ,then, I don’t expect it from any destitute or uneducated, too.Without thinking about others’ willingness, at least, am eager to do this important job.

The corrupt must be realized the might of an unbiased pen. At least some professions have to take care of the public concerns and see they remain unaffected by anyone.If this would not be a purpose of a journalist then whose? What this entire “knowledge”meant for?, if it doesn’t scare the dishonest that his conduct is being scrutinized by someone. Therefore, to make a purposeful use of my existence I wish to contribute a bit by pursuing no other profession but Journalism.


Personal Background
Attitude is all that matters in one’s life. This is what the life has taught me .And, without any doubt , I followed it like a lesson learnt by heart. Born in a middle class Brahmin family. I went through all that what others feel uncomfortable in.

The shortest boy of every queue and the thinnest one among all the sportsmen of the school. Inexplicable is all that what one suffers when even family proves ignorant to appreciate the child for encouragement.

The youngest one of the five ,one brother and three sisters and the last one,me. ,I learnt what outside world taught me through inflicting injuries.

But, thanks to the sports that taught me the most important lesson of life, “It’s one’s attitude that determines one’s success but not others opinion”.

While winning many events, mentioned like Badminton, Kabbaddi, Kho,Martial Arts at johnal
and state levels I developed the killer attitude of ‘making things possible’.But, despite getting admitted in a prestigious college(Ramjas College) by defeating 29 state and national level players I had to quit. The compelling reason, parents’ disliking for sports.

My first failure, in twelfth grade of school, transformed me completely. Making me too much serious about studies instead of sports.Surely, this was the U turn of my life.
.But,voices were raised to the extent of depriving me of further studies. Fortunately, by the next year, I proved them wrong ,securing first division. Anyhow, the enraged family had to cool down a bit..

During graduation, despite trying hard I didn’t make any fascinating impression. Therefore, by restricting my unimpressive studies, it was suggested, to put me in our small family business. But, despite bowing in front of family’s order I continued studying along with it through public library books.Three long years I cherished the fifty paise membership and studied a lot on human behavior.This is the study which actually inspired me to join journalism.

At last, I was allowed studying but on my own expense. Friends kept lending me money for my fees. And, I managed to afford because of their timely helps. But,for almost half a dozen diplomas that I did, I had to pay back by my little pocket money.

But,very hard is to mention the reasons for which I was not financed by my own family for pursuing studies. May be their ignorance, towards the professional training’s importance or the envy of my own elder brother, is the reason. I can’t say ,or perhaps, don’t want to. That’s why, despite making top thrice in notable insititutes , I never revealed it to my family,till date.The reason I can’t explain.

Unfortunately, I lost my father because of heart-attack this year, in the month of June,but my passion remained intact. Making my circumstances worst, my friends too have been transferred now and the life has become difficult.

Things have been going a bit tough for me but my strong attitude have answered fittingly to each of the challenge in my struggle to study.

Let see how my first scholarship exam favours me to continue!

My Meal....

As I have forced my mother not to move in early morning or in the evening from the bed as a precaution against the chill outside, I have to arrange for my meals from the market. Every morning, I have to first brood over for long to decide what should I eat. As, I have to think in terms of time consumption in buying from the market, bringing home and should also not affect the stomach.

The options being quite limited to Kachori or Chola Kulcha or Bhatura or the bread-butter has made me to have a cup of tea and Ras or biscuit in the morning. The reason being that either I can have my breakfast or read newspapers, a must to work in office as an informed person.

I start off for the office at 12.30 p.m and often the hurry is to just reach and gobble up anything available in the canteen. Unfortunately, it is 3.00 or 4.00 p.m. by the time I am free to search for lunch. The lunch items are over by 2.00 p.m. in the office canteen. Hence, I move out in search of something or rather anything to eat. Often, the choices is Chowmein, Momos, or Chole Kulche. Believe me, they are too spicey to be had everday.

The evening option is Chai, Bread Pakora and Samosa or Matthi.

The dinner is something that disturbs in fact disappoints me the most. I leave office by 10.00 or 10.15 and reach around 11 or later at home. By that time the little Dhabas or shops are closed or about to close. I have to manage with bacha-khucha. So it depends purely on my Kismat.

Yesterday was Sunday. It's a day I always waited to have Rajma Chawal, my favourite dish of the week and the Pudina Chattani prepared by my Mumma. But I couldn't have it yesterday. My Mumma noticed the following morning that I slept after having just Maggie at night. She said: Mainu Sharam Aayi Ki Tenu o sab Chowmein jaya kha ke sona paya raati (It felt shameful to notice that you had to eat that Chowmein type food at night). I said it wasn't exactly like that. It was just I had too much in lunch in office so to balance it, I took light food by 'choice'. I couldn't successfully befool her. After all she knows me more than myself...being my mother.

But....I accept this situation with a smile......for her sake. No regrets. Just smile.