Delhi Wallas do not think the Raj Thackeray's way but...

Delhi Wallas do not think the Raj Thackeray's way but...

By Sandeep Datta
Presence of people of different tastes, cultures and backgrounds is an advantage for the development of any place. Dilli, named Delhi by Britishers, is one such example of it. The confluence of people of all religions, castes and creeds has offered it a unique recognition of being a cosmopolitan city.

For having almost all amenities to offer a luxurious life and employment, Dilli has turned a major fascination for people across the country to settle here.

But there are some disturbing habits and issues that irk people born and brought up in Dilli about these visitors, migrants or the new settlers.

Day in or day out, a lot of non-natives of Dilli speak so much ill about this place. Be it rains, summer, strikes, lifestyle or a rising cost of living or difficulty to own a house or media reports about the city, all seem to serve as fodder for the city's criticism. The prevailing situation could be fare worse in different places but Dilli is viewed to the 'worst' among all.

It shocks to hear people arriving from far off regions of the country at this place -- Dilli -- known for having a big heart to accept all, criticising it as if this is worst place to live.

Like any other place of the world, Dilli also has its dark side which may not be liked by a lot of people. But like one's own house, no matter how many things maybe making us uncomfortable being in it, we never like our home being criticised at least by people who visit it for their motives.

I appreciate the local residents who despite noticing such visiting or non-native visitors routinely do not react bluntly ever lest it should also be equated with Australia or Britain, today known for racist violence.

But, at times, it compels as a native of Dilli, to point out what is largely being ignored by the Mast or, carefree Dilliwallas -- the visitors' attitude. It feels unbearable to watch Dilli and its residents being lampooned for everything. And, these critics being those who arrive uninvited after turning helpless in their native places to earn a livelihood or study!

Prominent objectionable habits among most of these (not all) visitors from different parts of the country is their basic view about the natives of Delhi and everything that the place is today known for in the world.

The general impresssion of Dilli made on the basis of observing something or anything in one part of the city may be completely fallicious, as be it the east, west, south or north Delhi and related parts are completely different in almost everything. The approach of people, their habits, their lifestyle, their awareness level, street smartness or lifestyle can surprise anyone. This is because residents's lifestyle or habits in any area of Delhi are influenced by distinct things or living or economic conditions.

But the topmost thing that I find outrageous among some of the visiting youngsters from the northeast or West Bengal is their dislike for Hindi, the Rashtra Bhasha or national language.

It galvanizes a person like me, who has always liked people beyond their region or language, to see the disgust such people have for everything in the north India or Delhi, in particular, or for Punjabis, more specifically.

The proverb ‘Jist Thali mein Roti khai usi Thali Mein Ched kiya’ or making holes in the same saucer one is given to eat comes to my mind everytime I come across such people who hate the very place; Delhi which has given them shelter or an opportunity to earn a decent livelihood or study.

It shocks oneself to notice how much ungrateful some of these people are.

They enjoy critcising everybody and everything they see in Dilli, ignoring the fact that how, contrary to rest of the India, people of this place has literally shared their saucer with them without ever complaining. Natives of Dilli have no separate reservation in jobs or any opportunity, a fact contrary to rest of the Indian states that have such provision to safeguard their first right on anything in their native State.

Be it education, employment in any walk of life, ration on control-rate shops, space to live or celebrate, people of Delhi have shared everything with them without hesitation. But still, such a rudeness, such ungratefulness, such unobliged attitude? It shocks anyone here literally.

God forbid, if people of Delhi actually started taking such people’s hatred for local people here by heart and asserted their first right to this place, what might happen then?

The growing frustration could compel them to make them force all migrants or visitors from other States to run away. What if some of the natives of Delhi started beating them with Chappals (slippers) or sticks or, if gently, then by social boycott; by not employing, not renting them, not giving them space to utilize any possible opportunity to live comfortably here?

People of Delhi have so far been tolerant and accommodating all these years, but God forbid if they turned intolerant. The time seems fast approaching when anyone criticizing Delhi or its dominant population of Punjabis may face angst in the form of public thrashing and nobody may dare to intervene.

I won't find it objectionable if somone invited such an extreme reaction (read public thrashing) for bad-mouthing about the very place and people that have given them a reason to live here and be happy with their peculiar lifestyle.

The question is -- Why cannot we learn to respect and value the place we visit or people we get a chance to live with? Why cannot we facilitate change instead of criticising things or people of a place? If Dilli belongs to everyone in the country, its lacunaes or imperfections are also everyone's responsibility. Before critising Dilli, we must ask to ourselves what have we done to make it a better place?

Or, if we really find it such a  bad place, why don't we leave it as it is and better look for some other place to be. Thank God, Dillwalas hate to think the Raj Thackeray's way.



(Writer's Note: While writing this write up I have kept three words--Refugees, Migrants, and the Guests--in my mind to evaluate or comment any situation being faced by people of Dilli (the natives or people who were born and brought up in Dilli) by people in Dilli (the non-natives of Dilli).

This latest piece is an attempt to reach an answer that while visiting a place what basic courtesy one should maintain?, especially if that place is going to offer livelihood for one's family and oneself.

Having written the write up about some of my irritating countrymen from different parts of the country or country, I would still say I am indebted to my friends from Bihar, Kerala, Karnataka, and the north east States mainly whose association shaped my personality and influenced me a lot. And, I don't wish to criticise their native places despite knowing a lot of negative about it.

I still have lot of things to appreciate about them, as I hold deep affection for all of them.)

Oct.1,2oo9

Thinking....deep about life......

I am disappointed over my ill-organised lifestyle. The weekly off vanish as if I never had them. The working days drift away with nothing distinct. I need change. I need innovative approach to explore maxium of this all important life.

The routine happenings make me feel, I need to develop new strategies for everything. It's been a long time since I worked on this aspect of family life. From children to the eldest member of the family, they need assistance to think and realise how they can lead their daily life in a better and enjoyable manner. I need to help them.

But prior to anything , I need to remember until I act myself, no change will be possible. I will have to make things happen. And, I will.

We, the off springs of modern life

With a majority of us adapting the “it’s my life” culture, and getting drawn towards enjoying life our wished way, the all-entrancing contemporary culture is redefining the meaning of life in Indian cities.

Though there is no ideal definition of living a life, still every region on earth adapts to a certain way of life. Gradually, certain prevalent practices take shape of rituals and after a few decades there are recognized as the traditions of that particular place.

In India, the fast developing cities observed on the basis of luxuries, facilities and per capita income of families are consistently creating a new lifestyle. Though the upper middle class usually copy it through films, serials, the middle classes spend most of their energy in making attempts to look as advanced the individuals of upper middle class turn.

It’s a maddening competition. Most of the families, especially the youngsters, are lost in this race to look like somebody popular or noticed in films or serials the previous night.

There is, however, a small section of people in this rapidly growing number of people who despite working day-night to realize its ambitions still remains deeply close or associated to family values. Basically, they know how to differentiate between a professional and personal life. Even if they learn the rules of the game but they know how to behave as a family person once they return home.

It disturbs to observe in the cosmopolitan cities like Mumbai, Delhi, Bangalore or Chennai, we, the Internet savvy or a bit over-informed individuals, are actually learning how to live the ‘isolated way’ and thus killing the family feeling from our personal lives..

Gone are the days when even a small joy was shared and participated by one and all. Be it a new bike or car, a new dress or any expensive or important item would spread a wave of greetings among the loved ones. Today, even someone’s demise doesn’t evoke much concern. People think twice before visiting the cremation ground. Perhaps, nobody has time or perhaps nobody wants to take out time.

The fast life of cities has no scope for taking out time for one’s own loved ones because of whom one gains success. The grandparents, parents, siblings or even old friends they are the first most of us being ignored by us, no matter how big role they played in our lives.

Visiting parties where barely anyone except the host recognizes us and skipping our family celebrations where everyone loves us, is one of the ills of this modern lifestyle. We have time for those to whom we don’t matter. But we are always short of time or too busy to be those who have been waiting for us with love every time. Isn’t it?

Perhaps, the new religion of our modern world forgot to accommodate the need, the moral responsibility and the courtesy of being with people we grew up calling as “our own”.

Be it rooms, television sets, computers, ipods or cellular phones, the modern technology has been successful in keeping us away from an affectionate world. The gazettes or facilities that were meant to facilitate one’s life to survive in a competitive world, have taken away the actual charm that even the people in Europe or the U.S crave for in their social life.

The joy people used to cherish just two decades ago in the cities is now limited to rural parts of India but not in city life. The villagers in India, many of whom even having cars, cellphones and lands worth millions of rupees, have very smartly shielded their traditional lifestyle from ‘city culture’. They value one’s family by its social standing which is built by socialization and good conduct with each other, the money is not the biggest characteristic to derive respect in villages. One’s dignity is hard-earned and easily lost depending upon the family’s conduct with others.

The city dwellers have finished it off almost altogether to look ‘modern’, to achieve ‘maximum’, or to look ‘advance’.

In Delhi, the national capital of India, some of the major issues perturbing the local people are parking-space, encroachment, wayward and rude children, delayed marriages and high separation or divorce cases.

Nobody, in general, wants to attend to the root cause; the arrival of modern culture which is derived not from the original western life where people work day-night to earn and for a better family care, but from Hollywood films which usually show all live for themselves and not for one’s own people.

The over-exaggerated version of Indian family life and individuals’ psychology as depicted in serials or the new charm to look one of MTV products as shown in Reality Shows now a days, are some of the major influences in today’s youngsters or family life.

There was a time when any festival or occasion like birthday or anniversary would be celebrated in a gala way with parents, siblings and neighbourhood friends at one’s own home. Close relatives or friends would travel long distances to greet and meet to show how much they actually care. But not anymore.

Today, every one of us pretends as if such things always existed in cinema or TV serials. Most of us describe that way of life as ridiculous but actually the need of the hour is to unite and promote family feeling among us. It is needed only if we want to save our family life and not live in our homes as paying guests or a group of visitors sharing a roof for some time.

We spend that ‘busy time’ getting romantic over mobile phones or chatting with strangers in the chat rooms or drinking outside. But not many of us think to take out even a little time asking our aged father or mother, if he/she expected us to talk to them that night.

Who can save us when the “I don’t care” is the way of life we, the so called educated minds, have opted to embrace.

Doest it really matter if our grandpa and grandma has awaited for our only holiday to share their interesting tales of a beautiful life? Or, the cute child or a loving wife wanted to share any “good” news. Who cares if the pet we joyfully brought years ago to our homes is now on the verge of dying?

Perhaps, it’s time to wake up and first revisit that philosophy of modernism that prevents us from protecting our rapidly segregating family life.